Thursday, March 01, 2007

Apparently its ODD

Well we went to see the paediatrician on Tuesday and he doesn't deal in behavioural problems but from what I told him he seems to think he has Oppositional Defiance Disorder, hmmm now after getting a bit more information on this from my good friend "Google" I find out that this could be almost any child!!!!

But he also said to me that I am partly to blame for this behaviour (see its always the mothers fault) because I let him push my buttons and although he is only 8 he knows exactly which ones to push the most to make me react. So the doctor tells me that when this happens next time I have to think there is a pause button in my head and hit pause.

So far we have been incident free its is quite amazing that he has actually been behaving himself and I feel like I am on valium as I am trying to take a much more relaxed view on things. I know its only early days but now we have to go see a psychologist, and to get into one of them is a three month waiting period because of the lack of them in the area, its that or go to Sydney and I am not up for a 3 hour drive.

I feel terrible that I could be responsible for this and I am hoping that by changing my ways hopefully I can make him be the good boy that I know he can be, see that's what I told the doctor he has a great heart and lovely nature when he wants to and alot of people tell me that. The thing that he has trouble with is when someone else is getting more attention he does something naughty to make them notice him and the thing is I know that children do that also especially when in a larger family.

The main thing is we are starting afresh and its not something that he is not going to be able to change I was worried he may need medication for his behaviour but he doesn't so its just a daily thing and we'll manage.


Ruth.... said...

Parenting can be a real challenge...especially for parents of 8 year olds. Knowing you, though Kath, I can't imagine you've made too many mistakes. You're one of the best Mums I've ever known. (and if you've made mistakes I'm gonna make some too 'cos I've based a lot of my parenting on your examples.)

Merry Munchkin Designs said...

I tried to leave this comment last night but blogger would not let me.

Kathie, you are an amazing mum, and if I know anyone who can guide P through this with love and patience and compassion, it is you.

I learned so much about being a mum from you, please dont ever forget how wonderful you are.

Love Tye x

Little Miss Kylie said...

Hey Kathie,

I think most parents are their own harshest critics.

I live with the assumption that if I'm given enough time, I'll screw Finn up eventually.

Most kids are busy. Finn was diagnosed with Hyperactivity disorder which, to my own amazement, we manage WITHOUT medication.

Please promise me, you will not go down that route until you've exhausted every other possible avenue.

Parenting is hard and unfortunately kids don't come with instruction manuals. We do the best we can with what we have available to us at the time.

Don't beat yourself up.

If you really, really want to see a Paediatrician who specialises in behavioural disorders, I'd be more than happy to ask Finn's Paediatrician (who himself specialises in behaviour disorders) to recommend someone close to where you live.

Seriously. If it would help you to have a doctor on your side, let me know and I'll do what I can.

Take care.

roseys madhouse said...

thankyou so much guys Im all teary now.
Ruth: OMG you are so much more calmer than I have ever been but thankyou
Tye: Thankyou so much for you comment
LMK:The doctor told me to see a pychologist and I have to wait now till they can fit me in.
But honestly there has been a vast improvement since visiting the doctor.
The other night he had a bit of a drama and instead of me getting angrier and angrier with him because he isnt listening I just turned off the light and said goodnight love you and walked away.
But thankyou I will definately keep that in mind for if need be